Beautiful things

This song is beautiful. Have a listen. And drink in the words.

'All this pain, I wonder if I'll ever find my way, I wonder if my life could really change at all?
All this earth, could all that is lost ever be found? Could a garden come up from this ground at all?

You make beautiful things, you make beautiful things out of the dust,
You make beautiful things, you make beautiful things out of us.

All around hope is springing up from this old ground, out of chaos life is being found in you.'

 - Gungor, 'Beautiful Things'

There is hope. And it doesn't come from inside us. Beauty is possible in brokenness because of the Beautiful One who imparts life and hope. Grace bestowed on the undeserving!

The year of.....

So things have been a bit quiet from my end recently...but that doesn't mean my thoughts have been quiet! Just that somewhere between my mind and my fingertips those thoughts have got lost or muddled. I am starting this post not entirely sure what I will write. And as I am starting to write a whole load of things are coming to my mind, so this could be the opening of the blogging flood-gates - the start of a blogging frenzy?

But anyway, as tomorrow is the beginning of the Chinese new year, and i have some thoughts I have been meaning to post something since our new year, i thought this might be the most appropriate opportunity to write about 'year naming'. This is an idea that came from Ann Voskamp, who likes to name her year before it begins. To set the scene, here is part of a conversation I had on skype with my friend Sophie a while back:

[11/01/2010 19:10:08] Alison Young: so, you know Ann has made this her year of YES! Have you named your year?
[11/01/2010 19:10:55] Sophie: ironically no!
[11/01/2010 19:11:00] Sophie: I like the idea tho.
[11/01/2010 19:11:20] Alison Young: me too....but i sort of think its easier to name something after its happened..
[11/01/2010 19:11:44] Sophie: yes i know what you mean. i don't feel very prophetic!
[11/01/2010 19:12:34] Sophie: i suppose it's just the same idea as a resolution because it means you set out to have a certain approach to stuff and that's good - well, depending on the name!
[11/01/2010 19:13:06] Alison Young: yeah....you'd have to be more of a positive thinker than me i think.
[11/01/2010 19:12:52] Sophie: what would you name your last year?

So I decided that 2009 could be called the year of hope. There were lots of reasons for this, but top on the list was the fact that 2009 saw me becoming more and more convinced of the wonderful and certain hope of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Hope that has nothing to do with how I feel or how circumstances look. Hope that says that I am in Jesus Christ and brought into the glorious community of the Happy Trinity. Hope that tells me that all my righteousness and salvation is in Jesus, and so couldn't be more secure! 2009 - the Year of HOPE!

And that led me to thinking about this verse from Romans 12, verse 12:

'Be joyful in hope...'

So if 2009 was the year of hope, then 2010 can be the year of joy. Not because I 'have a feeling I will be in a good mood for 365 days', but because if I have hope then joy is possible in all circumstances. If I feel I have nothing else to be joyful in, I still have hope. And it is not a momentary hope, that changes with my feelings, but a sure and certain hope, that depends only on Jesus and not at all on me.

2010 - the Year of JOY

"By faith we eagerly await through the Spirit the righteousness for which we hope" Galatians 5:5

Waiting for that day...

"There is no escape from an aching soul, only denial of it. The promise of one day being with Jesus in a perfect world is the Christian's only hope for complete relief. Until then we either groan, or pretend we don't"
Larry Crabb, Inside Out.

In some ways I would love for this to not be true. I would love to be able to say that perfect joy is available now, that aches can be removed, that frustrations can be alleviated fully; that we can trust perfectly, love completely and await our Saviour with dry eyes. I wish we could promise a pain-free existence in this life with perfect relationships and no disappointments. But the truth is, some things are reserved for a day that hasn't arrived yet.

There are lots of things that are meant for today - forgiveness, justification and union with the Lord Jesus to name but a few. But we live in a twilight zone where God's promises are real but not all of them consummated, and some only partly realised but not fully. And so that's why we groan, aching for the day when promises become reality. The day when groaning gives way to shouts of joy.

Until that day we ache and hurt, and it is messy. But He who is eternally faithful has promised the better day, the day when tears will be wiped away, the day when our thirst will be truly quenched, the day when joy will be the very air that we breathe. So we can wait in confidence and hope, and we are free to acknowledge that an aching soul is the norm; it is part of this present age. The ache is there because we were made for more - and the 'more' is coming! So there is much joy, be it through tears.

²²We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. ²³Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. ²⁴For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? ²⁵But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

 ²⁶In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. ²⁷And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.

Romans 8:22-27

Being real

I like songs that are real. What I actually mean by this is that I like melancholy songs. Now for a melancholy person, listening to melancholy songs can be a bit dangerous. That's why when I found myself making a playlist of songs for my ipod yesterday called 'melancholy' I stopped myself.

I stopped myself because I have to be very careful in this area. The last thing I want to do is yield to becloudedness. But then I thought about the songs that I was selecting for this playlist. Were they really melancholy? Yes, I suppose they were, but the overriding theme in each song was hope in the amazing God who is our creator and sustainer. These kind of songs sneak hope into places where hope has been beclouded, in a way that is unassuming and consistent with reality. They turn our eyes gently upwards to gaze on our Maker, without pretending there are no tears. They tell us the truth about our great God without creating an imaginary world of fluffy, fuzzy perfection. And so I am grateful for such songs.

For that reason I decided not to abandon the playlist. Instead I changed the name to 'songs of beholding'.

Sometimes we need the honesty of these songs.

Sometimes however, we don’t.

Sometimes we just need to get over ourselves and stop feeding the parts of ourselves that enjoy the darkness. This might mean listening to upbeat songs like 'Life' by Desiree, which includes lines full of meaning, such as: 'I don't want to see a ghost, it's the sight that I fear most, I'd rather have a piece of toast, watch the evening news.' (Rhyme it sister!!) Or it might involve watching Flight of the Conchords until you feel you might die with laughter (feel free to replace with whatever comic genious you enjoy more).

Sometimes this works.

Sometimes it doesn’t.

So one needs great discernment in knowing what one needs in any given state of melancholy. My resolve is to be careful, and to keep enjoying and appreciating the moments of light-heartedness given to me in this world. To listen to the feel-good songs as well as the thought-provoking ones. To be real, but fun; serious, but spontaneous; sorrowful but overflowing with joy! To love deeply, give freely, breathe in great lungfuls of God's wonderful grace regularly. To lean my full weight upon the one who made me. To keep being honest about what I am feeling and asking Him to protect me from the sin of indulging in despair.

A response to the secular perspective on hope in the face of despair

From BBC Website:

Facing despair

Hope is based in reality - it's not optimism, wishing or dreaming. Facing up to dark and difficult truths enables hope to emerge and new doors to open.

For example, when cancer is first diagnosed the hope is for a cure. If the cancer spreads or the treatment doesn't work then the hope changes - one hopes that the cancer can be held at bay for as long as possible with few symptoms. Hopes for family holidays, reunions and anniversaries can be worked on and achieved. This can be a special time.

If the cancer spreads further and it becomes clear that it'll cause death then hope shifts again. The hope is for a peaceful, pain-free death, for good endings with friends and family, for reconciliations - and for preparation with spouses and children who'll be left behind. Memory boxes and books, letters and photographs can be used to pass on pearls of wisdom and hopes for the future of those left behind. Beliefs beyond death can be examined and spiritual issues never normally discussed can lead to deep and meaningful moments with huge intimacy and understanding.

Setting achievable goals

When despair creeps in it's often because expectations are unrealistic. Goals can be set that are impossible to achieve and the person repeatedly fails and becomes frustrated and hopeless. Re-setting goals and accepting limitations means that plans go ahead and pleasure and fulfilment allow hope to return - and despair vanishes.

For instance, many people dream of a holiday somewhere warm and sunny. However, holiday insurance can be difficult to obtain, travelling by air can be fraught with obstacles and it seems that one barrier after another is put in the way. Altering the goal slightly to travel within Europe by train or a visit to the beautiful Devon coast, for example, can suddenly make this dream a reality, and hope is back.

Day to day, it's important to attempt activities that are achievable - it may no longer be possible to dig over the entire garden, but it may be hugely rewarding to plant out summer bedding plants and transform the garden with colour.

Dreams and wishes are important but can disappoint and frustrate. Hope is real and gives huge comfort and peace - leaving no room for despair.

Dr Suzy Jordache, BCC Website (http://www.bbc.co.uk/relationships/coping_with_grief/terminalillness_hope.shtml)

I do not doubt the wisdom in this advice TO SOME EXTENT. I am sure that learning to set achievable goals really makes a difference when expectations are high and physical capability is diminishing. But is this really the best hope that the world has to offer?

Is this all we can offer people - the hope of a final holiday? The hope of a pain free death? The hope of not being forgotten? Of passing on wisdom to the next generation? IS THAT THE BEST WE CAN DO?

What happens when we return from the holiday? What happens when the pain doesn't go away? Can true, life-giving hope really be rooted in these things? Are real people in this real, broken world really satisfied with these solutions?

There is only one sure foundation for hope in the face of despair, hope in the face of death:

'Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed— in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: "Death has been swallowed up in victory." ' - 1 Corinthians 15:51-54

'And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."
He who was seated on the throne said, "I am making everything new!" Then he said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true."' - Revelation 21:3-5

Oh how I ache for the fulfillment of those words. And oh how I ache for the people around me to know their truth.

Lamentations 3:19-24

I remember my affliction and my wandering,
the bitterness and the gall.

I well remember them,
and my soul is downcast within me.

Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."