'a frog fries the garlic' - only 50 baht!

So, today was my last day in Lopburi for the time being. I finished the second module of my language study and I move to Nakhon Sawan tomorrow. I celebrated mainly by eating sweet things. But a totally unexpected highlight of my day was lunch. I went to the Mosquito Restaurant with some of the other language learners (that is its official name by the way…its other official name is the Blue Restaurant…), and as we sat down we were handed a newly created English Menu. Concealing our laughter as we read it was difficult.

These are some of the dishes on offer in the Mosquito Restaurant:

Some of my favourites:

‘A frog fries the garlic’

‘Minced snake-head fish meat’

‘Mix noodles made of green’

‘Mix total up the friend’

‘Mix a pig praises’

‘Cook time squid hand, frame pig’

‘Cook time shrimp hand, fried rice the shrimp’

Even reading them now, for about the 50 millionth time, I am laughing my head off! Laughter truly is a wonderful gift! The Lord knows how to bless us when we’re least expecting it…and in very weird and wonderful ways!

Favourite language mistakes #4

Scene: Alison walks into the coffee room at school and is greeted by her Thai teachers. Some conversation ensues in Thai. Alison idly busies herself making a cup of coffee and answers questions about what she had for lunch, where she went, who was there etc. After a while Alison starts to get a bit lost....it deserves a mention here that unless Alison concentrates REALLY hard, she does not notice the difference between the words 'tengaan' (marry) and 'thamngaan' (work)...this is where the problem began...

Teacher Wan: Alison, would you like to marry an old person?

Alison (clearly hearing something else): Yes

Wan (laughing): really? You would like to marry an old person?

Alison: Yes

Other teachers (also laughing): old person?

Alison: (slightly suspiciously this time):...yes?

More laughter.

The Conversation switches to English.

Alison: What? What did I say?

Teachers: You will marry an old person!

Alison: What!? No, you asked me if I like working with old people!!

More laughter, Alison joins in...then makes a swift exit with her coffee.

Favourite language mistakes #3

Word for milk: 'nom'
Word for wind: 'lom'

Recently I have caused a few giggles for asking, not for a pineapple milk-shake as I intended, but pineapple with 'wind'!

Keep pressing on Alison....keep pressing on!

Things that get me through a church service:

Church here is hard work (because it is 2+ hours of Thai that I don't understand).

These are the things that help me survive:

- not thinking about time - i.e. what time it might be, how long the service has been so far, how long it will be til it's over....etc.

- reading the English on people's clothing.

- eating sweets.

- making mental lists of things I need to do/emails I need to send.

- planning my next blog entry.

Things I think I probably could do during church that would be more productive than what I actually do:

- trying to listen out for words I recognise.

- read the Bible.

- try and read the Thai along with the songs.

- pray for people.